Gaining Victory Over Fear and Addiction Through Faith : Journey of Resilience with Jonathan Field

Well, hello and welcome back, my friend. Man, this week I'm joined by Jonathan Field. And Jonathan has like gone through transformation or forever, you know, making these changes, adjusting, growing, looking for the, the better version of who we can be in our life. And so Jonathan, you're going to hear from his story that it's filled with hope that it's filled with, you know, working through, despite the fear, despite the challenge that we're facing right now, that he kept looking for that better direction and for him now, you know, he's doing coaching, helping, um, helping to find that transformation, that identity shift that if we hold onto the past, it's an anchor keeping us back. He is providing the coaching and also speaking on how we cut those anchors, those ties that are holding us back to experience that freedom that's available to us. Once we continue to push and grow and put in the work to bring about that transformation. So Jonathan, how are you doing today? My friend?

I am doing great. Thanks.

Absolutely. I appreciate you joining me. Um, Hey, can we start off with what does life look like for you today on the professional side?

Sure. I have recently embarked on a mission of helping men overcome toxic habits and establish resilience, really focusing on identity. Um, this is through speaking and personal one on one coaching as well as group coaching.

Awesome. Um, and then what does it look like for you on the personal side of life?

Personal side of life is a little bit more established. Um, thank God all these brand new things aren't happening at once. That could be a little bit overwhelming, but personally awesome. Uh, I'm a father of four, multiple, more children, um, nine kids altogether. If you count, um, children that I've raised, um, but I have four kids at home from four years old to 12 years old, almost 13. And, um, yeah, personally, it's amazing. Got an awesome wife and, uh, yeah.

Awesome. Very cool. Um, so, having nine children, like what's the biggest, I've got four and I know the challenge for me was they were all unique, right? None of them were the same. Is that like, the same that you've experienced or like, what do you see like as your biggest challenge raising nine children?

Wow. Well, I didn't raise all of them. Um, eight, I've raised seven from the time they were children. Um, I was estranged from my, my first son from my first marriage for quite a while, but we are back together now. So I was with him till he was three, but yeah, um, as far as personalities, they're all different. Um, some of them, some of them, uh, the majority of them techniques work, the same techniques will work on them. Um, but then you get one here or there that, you know, the things that worked on the other ones don't work on them. And, uh, so yeah, it's amazing how, how different they are, but they're all, it's a blessing to raise them all. Like I love being a dad. That's, that's been like the biggest dream of my life. To be a father and, and the most fulfilling.

Yeah, absolutely. I agree. Um, well, let's, let's jump back and, and talk about some of the things that, you know, you've, you've changed over, you've transformed, you've worked through, right? Um, you know, speaking about, like, changing our identity and reidentifying who we are and, you know, like, letting go of the past. Let's start from there and then understand, like, how you've done that. So, um, can, can you take us back to, like, what were some of the challenges that you overcame, um, you know, like, way back when? We'll, we'll talk about the more recent stuff, but let's go back and, and talk about some of the challenges you overcame on the initial, um, part.

Yeah, I can, I can only imagine. I mean, when, when that kind of thing happens, the void, it would leave, but you're also like, now I have to figure, figure out what my path is and who I am. How did you go about doing that? I mean, was there family around that could help you with that or other like adults? Anybody around to help you transition through that?

Well, at that point I actually became a Christian and, uh, I, all my life I had prayed to Jesus, you know, uh, in fact, my brother, when I, when I left with him to start traveling around the country, he told me, he said, Hey, you know, we're, he's like, we're, we're having fun now. He's like, but I want to, one day I want to get married, have a family, start going to church. We had never gone to church, but this was an idea that, that he had, had that he wanted to have one day. And, and so that was the plan. And, um, you know, before he passed away, uh, some of the guys that were in the hotel room with him, they told me that, you know, he slipped into a coma. He, he initially overdosed and then he came out of the coma for two or three minutes, and he was asking questions and before he slipped back into the coma, and, uh, he was asking, uh, this one guy that was in the room if he believed in God. And so I know that the last things on my brother's mind before he passed away was God. And, uh, and, and even though he felt lost at the time, you know, he, I believe that we are not saved by our own goodness that, uh, Jesus paid the price for us that we couldn't pay on our own. And, um, and I know that the Lord was on my brother's mind before he passed away. So that, that really, that kind of gripped me and that made me, uh, here I am. I feel like that was his last thoughts. And so. Now I'm like, I'm going to be a Christian. I'm going to, this is going to be my life. And so I didn't really have, um, anybody to guide me in the sense of, I initially got involved with kind of a really religious church and I was taught a lot of rules and, um, a lot of limiting beliefs. And, um, it would take me quite a while. I, I kind of believed that the initial doctrines that I believed as a Christian are what kept me addicted to, to, to drugs for all these years. Cause I ended up backsliding when I turned 19, I inherited some money and I fell back into, um, you know, drugs. And, but now I was all alone. And, and so, uh, prostitutes and things like that. And, uh, the, what I was taught was that as a Christian, all we have to look forward to is heaven. And there's no real victory on this side of the, uh, this side of, of heaven. And that we just kind of have to grit our teeth and bear it and just endure and make it through because one day we get to go to heaven and it's going to pretty much be really terrible here, here on this earth. But you know, one day we have heaven and, and that doctrine and that belief can work for some people. Um, That may have some secret sins that are manageable, but the things that I dealt with was, was hardcore addiction and womanizing and, and ultimately I wanted to be a family man and, and, and the addiction doesn't, is not really conducive to family life or freedom, you know, it would be years later, I ended up going to prison for the first time, uh, for crimes that I was, I was committing while I was on drugs and, um, yeah. But, but to answer your question, I did have some guidance and I'm thankful for the journey that I've been on. I wouldn't say it's the best guidance for, for somebody with my history and my background, but I eventually, I did eventually break free from, from all of that stuff and did find freedom about 13 years ago.

So as you're going through that, I mean, you're looking, you're being told, Hey, this is going to be super rough. There's really no hope here, right? And it sounds like that was kind of reflected in how things were going day to day. Uh, doesn't sound like there was too much in the way of like relational support. So you're kind of navigating this solo. Is that right?

I was involved in my church. Um, but you know, I was maybe, maybe it was me, maybe it was the culture of, of the, the church that I was involved with. I ended up when I, when I got this, this money and I started like falling back into sin, it became a secret thing for me. So I had this double life going where I had a church life and then I had a, when Jonathan's all alone life. That, that is too shameful to talk about with anybody. And, uh, there was nobody in my life that I, I was honest with, um, that I felt like I could be honest with. So I just hid it and eventually I ran away. I ran away from, from the community that I was involved in. And, uh, I made up some story that I was going to go, uh, check out this Christian school on the other side of the country in California that all these people had, had been involved with. And, uh, really I was just trying to get away from them, from any accountability because I just, I just felt terrible about myself. I can, I can say I've been through a lot in my life, but this was a time in my life that I'm speaking about right now when I was 19 and 20 that I, the shame, the guilt, um, the hatred for myself, the disgust with myself was at the highest. Like, like I, I just believed that God tolerated me. I didn't, I didn't understand that he loved me and that it wasn't based on my performance and, and I had never been really taught about God's love, or at least I didn't have a revelation of it to where I could come to him no matter what, even in the midst of my sin, that he always accepts me and that he loves me. And so, because I felt like he just tolerated me. And he was disgusted with me. That's how I, I felt about myself. Or it could be that I felt so much that way about myself. He had to have, cause he sees everything and he's seeing these things that I'm hiding from people and everything, my light, I'm like naked in front of him. And, and, uh, and he sees all of that. And so I just didn't think there was any way that he could love me. And so, yeah, that was, that was rough. I mean, suicide was on the table at that point. And this was when I had money, I had money for the women. I had money for the drugs. Every time I quit using drugs back then, it wasn't because I ran out of money like a lot of people, it's like I had the money. I just realized how empty and unfulfilling it was. I had, up to that point, between the time my brother had passed away, between 17 and 19, I had some genuine encounters with God. I had experienced God's love. I had experienced, um, fulfillment in that, and knowing my creator. And, uh, and anytime I went back to those old things, I just felt terrible. It was after I became a Christian that I, suicide, like I thought about suicide, um, because I just, those things that I used to find so much fulfillment out of, did not compare to what I had experienced in my relationship with God.

So how did you move like, we'll, we can think that we're the only ones going through, you know, what we're experiencing, right? That shame, that self hatred, loathing, lack of worth, right? We don't see our value and we're hiding it. Because we're feeling shame and guilt, how did you move through that? Because you're living that double life, that hidden life, then you go to, you know, jail. How did you transform out of that to where it's like, no, this needs to be addressed? I, you know, I'm choosing not to step back into this cycle, this downward spiral that, you know, the action medicates and removes the stress. But then I feel more shame and guilt and it just compounds and piles on. How did you move out of that?

It's kind of a journey, but, but I will say that the first major decision I made in my life was I was not going to fake it and lie anymore. Uh, and I'll, I got married when I was 23 years old and immediately after that, my wife, my ex-wife and I, we, we planned to have a son, or to have a child. And so as soon as we, we went for that and that was the goal within about a month, she was pregnant and, um, we had my first son and, um, his name, I named him after my brother who passed away to carry on his name, Jacob Lee Field. And something came alive in me that I had never known that I could love somebody like this and, um, you know, but I still had this, like, little, and I will kind of say little comparatively to how it had been in the past. But while I was married, you know, I didn't know how to deal with stress, uh, while I was married to my ex-wife and if we'd get into a fight or if things were really stressful, I would go and I would, uh, I would score some meth and I would go do meth. And I would never like disappear for days or weeks at a time. In fact, um, I would come home and I would act like I wasn't high and I would literally lay in bed next to my ex-wife all night and fake like I, try to fake like I was sleeping. Um, and the reason why I would do that is the times when I would want to just be honest with her and share with her, and the times where I was just like, man, it eats me up inside. I'm, I don't want to live a double life. I love this per, this woman as much as I knew how to love her, um, back then. And I, I didn't want to lie. And so I would confess to her, Hey, I went and I got some meth today and I did that. She, um, she would just be so judgmental. And now, now keep in mind her and I, in the beginning of our relationship, we did meth together, but as soon as she got pregnant, she, she was amazing at this, I will, I will say, is that as soon as she found out she was pregnant, she quit and she never, she, uh, had vowed to not touch it again. For me, it wasn't so easy. I had, I had every once in a while, I would just go back to it. I had so many positive memories from the drugs to where it wasn't like such a terrible thing to where I could use it for stress relief. Plus I have, uh, I didn't know at the time like an ADHD brain. So the amphetamines actually kind of were clicking something in my brain and making me a little bit more productive and I believed that it was helping me so um, so I would lie to her. And, um, because when she, when I would tell her the truth, it wasn't a safe place and judgment and condemnation. She would, she would act like she just witnessed somebody she loved get murdered in front of her. Like it was like the end of the world if I, if I was honest. And so she ended up leaving me and, um, you know, I had made my mind up and the decision that I was never going to lie to people again, you know, I was doing this drug. I love my son. I felt like a terrible person when the family was broke up, but I didn't know how to quit doing the drugs. And I knew that I had to just be honest with people. And so vulnerability was a huge thing. So when I would meet potential people, I was dating, I would tell them right off the bat. I said, Hey, I'm a drug addict and I've got problems in my life. I didn't want it to be a surprise. And also the reason why I was being vulnerable is I was just hoping somebody had answers for me. And so when my friends that I knew from church would ask me how I was doing, my true friends, you know, I wouldn't just dump on everybody, but, um, I would tell them, I'm like, man, it's terrible. I'm like hooking up with woman after woman and, and I'm doing meth every day. And man, it's terrible, and I don't know how to quit. I was just hoping somebody had answers for me. It would be some years down the road before those answers came. But one, step one to answer your question, I know it was a long answer, is vulnerable. We have to be willing, we have, sometimes you have to prove to yourself that this isn't something you want to be doing because your brain can kind of play tricks on you when you're dealing with addiction, whether it be pornography or whether it be drugs, whether what, no matter what it is, anything you say, I'm not going to do anymore and you find yourself doing, sometimes you have to do, make decisions and take action. So you prove to yourself that this isn't what I would want to be doing, because you can kind of think, Oh, I, well, there's a part of me that wants to be doing it. That's why I keep doing it. But, but sometimes we have things stuck. And so for me to, one of the ways that I had to prove to myself that I didn't want to be doing it is I had to be brave enough to be vulnerable and tell people that I knew cared about me or tell people that I hoped could have some answers for me, the truth about my life. And, and, um, you know, so vulnerability is huge in that if you don't have the answers, and you can't figure out how to stop doing these things, somebody out there has an answer for you. So you, you gotta be honest with yourself. If you keep hiding it, um, then, then you're not really, if you keep it in darkness, you're not really ever going to, it's going to be real hard to, to break free from something like that.

Yeah. And when we're not vulnerable, we're almost like holding ourself hostage to that situation, that addiction, whether it's, you know, like you talked about drugs, porn, could be video games, whatever the case may be, um, we're holding ourself hostage with that old identity instead of saying, Hey, how do I tell myself the truth? And how do I find a solution to break out of this shame, this guilt, this, you know, self hatred and loathing? Um, how did you, you said it was a couple years later until you found the answer, how did you come across the answer to, you know, to get out of that? Because you're being vulnerable, um, what was the difference that, you know, led you on that path to, to find the answer of finding, you know, the transformation, the freedom from that.

It was really, um, it started with, uh, getting a revelation of God's love for me. Remember I told you when I was 19, I didn't have that at all, you know, I had never been taught that Jesus loved me. I was kind of taught that if you don't get your life right, you're going to miss the rapture or you're not going to go to heaven when you, when you die and God's going to reject you. Um, but the Bible says that it's his kindness that leads us to repentance. And once I got a, uh, one night I got a revelation of, of, uh, of God's love for me by reading through the book of Romans. Uh, one night it just came alive to me and it was really Romans 5, 6, 7, and 8 that was, that was huge for me. Um, and, and just understanding that it wasn't my righteousness, that God accepts me, that he loves me, that there's no condemnation to those who are in Christ. And, um, you know, once I learned that and I just identified as a person who loves God, I wasn't going to, and I used to run in shame, like Adam and Eve, you know, in the garden when they had sinned, when I would, when I would find myself doing something shameful, I would run and hide from God. Once I realized that I didn't have to do that and that I was accepted always, and that I, it's not that God loves me, I am loved by God. There's a settling. I, I finally just settled it. God loves me forever. It's, he doesn't change. He's not going to leave me or forsake me. Even when I was on drugs, I would still, I finally just said, well, I'm not going to run from you anymore, God. If it's really about a relationship with you, I'm going to sit, even if, I'm not going to stay in shame. And so even if I can't stop doing this meth. Even if I can't stop womanizing and sleeping with these women, then I'm not going to let it stop me from, from coming and sitting in your presence because uh, worship has always been a really big part of my life. And, uh, so I would listen to preaching. I would listen to worship music. I would literally be on, high on meth, uh, and just sit there, I wasn't your typical guy. In fact, I would share, share with other meth addicts that said they were Christians, like things like this worship music and stuff like that. And they're like, dude, turn that off. I'm I'm here, you know, they were still in the shame place. But so for me, it was that love, just realizing that I'm accepted no matter what. And I, and there's a creator who loves me and I would, I would sit in his presence no matter what, and I would stop running from him. But that love began to get, I began to get a deeper and deeper revelation of that love, um, combined with, um, a new identity. You know, we're instructed in the new Testament to put off the old man and to put on Christ, to wear a new identity. It says, uh, that in Ephesians, that, that the new man, that when we get born again, the new man, the old man passes away, we become a new creature. But it says that this new spirit man, who we are is created in righteousness and true holiness. And so I began to realize that, that there's this dual nature in me. You know, you have, you have, uh, the mind of the flesh, you know, this thing that craves pleasure and, uh, and things like that. But then the real me is my spirit. The real me that when I die and I go to heaven is, is my spirit man. I don't get a new spirit. Now the Bible talks about, we get a new body and our soul, we get, uh, uh, our soul is renewed, but, but the real me right now is a spirit created in God's image. So I began to learn how to identify with who I am in the spirit. When I die, when this body dies and I go be with God, and I'm known, and I know the things that I know, everything that I'm supposed to know, like I am going to be this perfected person with God. And I'm already that in my spirit. So I had to learn to kind of disassociate with this old, the history and the old man and the, the ability to fail with a new nature. You know, um, Peter talks about that we're partakers of the divine nature. So we actually, when we get born again, when we become Christians, we get a new nature and that's why you kind of feel bad doing the old things that used to bring you so much pleasure and you get joy from laying your life down and serving people and, and giving. So it was really the, the, the, the main thing for me to get free, was this deep understanding of God's love for me and that he's wanting to bless me. He wants me to have a fulfilled life, but I'm also not defined by my past and I'm not defined by my failure. I'm defined by who does God say I am? And what really happened when I became a new creature? Jesus said, you have to be born again. So when I got born again, who am I? And so disassociating with the old and associating with who I truly am, who was my, who am I really, because I'm not going to be struggling with sin, and looking at women, and drugs and these things, I'm not going to be struggling with all of these things when I pass on and when I'm with God. I'm going to be who I really am in my fullness. So it's about learning to identify with him. The real you now. It's kind of freeing, man. It's pretty amazing because I'm not that guy. I don't have to be ashamed about that. And the truth is, as long as I'm in this body, I'm always going to have this inclination to do things that I'm not supposed to do. That's okay, we all do. Jesus was tempted in every way. That's what the Bible says. He was tempted in every way, yet he was still who he was. He's still perfect. He's still righteous and holy. So just because I'm tempted by that, or even if I happen to fall into that stuff, I don't define myself by that anymore. I define myself as one with God, created in his image and the truth about him and his nature is the truth about the real me. I know that was a long answer. I hope it, I hope it made sense.

Absolutely. Um, so oftentimes people can look and go, Hey, you made a decision like this, and they will expect like, Hey, I'm supposed to be perfect, you know, like, I'm not going to make mistakes. There's not grace for themselves, right? So I could look at you, Jonathan, and say, Hey, you did this, and I would extend grace. I'd be like, okay, cool. No worries, Jonathan. But that self, um, you know, like when we go through that stuff, it's also, you know, oftentimes like this cruel self critical judgment, right? That grace is not there. Um, so, you know, it's like looking at yourself to be perfect when that's not the expectation that we place on others.

Right.

As you're going through this transformation, you know, you're, you're changing your identity of who you are. Like, did, did things continue to grow or, you know, like, um, were there any more challenges or it was just a smooth road, you know, once you're like, Hey, this is my new identity? I mean, like, we'll go back to that honesty and, you know, just that, that vulnerability. I mean, like what, how did things progress from there?

So you said there were like a lot of, you know, you read books in there to help change your mindset and reidentify. So if I'm sitting here, hey, Jonathan, I've just lost my job. Um, you know, I'm behind on my bills. I'm struggling with the relationship with my wife. What are some books that you, you read during that time that would help me, you know, stay in that positive mindset like you were in? That, you know, you're staving off the fear, you're not succumbing to it and being like the rest of the, the, the population in there, and even what we see outside, right? It's normal to be afraid when stuff like that happens. What are some books that you read that helped you to stay in that elevated mindset and stay strong, not just for you, but for your family?

Yeah. Mike, I will, real quick, I will even say that it's very abnormal when threats are being thrown at you, especially by the federal government, to not be afraid, to reject that. Like, I was, that's not normal. Like, I understand, I understand why people make decisions out of fear. For me, I just made a commitment to myself. Before that all happened, that I was never going to make a decision based on fear. And I'm going to make a faith decision. Um, as far as books, I can't really name specific books, but, but I can tell you there's things that I've learned along the way. And, um, there, there, there is this idea of extreme ownership. There's even a book about it, which I can't really say that I've read the whole thing, but, but it is the idea of taking ownership. And, you know, if you're, if you're facing that, you know, the job situation, behind on bills, the first step is to be honest and real. If you want to grow, you have to take extreme ownership. You can't, you know, you may have been dealt a bad hand, but you, I think it's really important for us to just get real honest about how we ended up where we are. Like for me, um, though, I didn't believe. At the time that I, I had committed this crime, I totally see, and I, and I still think it's a little, it was a little crazy, and there were a lot of lies that were told about me, um, by people getting on a stand because they were kind of bribed. They, they had to make up something about me so that they could get this deal from the government. Um, but still, I'm not a victim. I, I see, I look back on it, honestly. And I think if you're really honest, especially if God is a part of your life. Actually, I'm 100 percent convinced that if you're honest and you look at your life, you reflect back, you'll see how God was trying to lead you away from that. God's not mad at you. He's not making this terrible thing happen to you. You caused it. There's something that, there's a decision you made that got you to this place. And that's okay. Like you talked about, it's not about perfection. As humans, we learn everything through failure. The way you learn how to walk is by falling down over and over again. The way you learn how to ride a bike is by falling down over and over again. The way you get awesome at anything is through sucking at it at first. And so, you know, first off it's being honest. Um, and then a lot of people think that if they're honest about how, you know, that they take responsibility for it, um, I don't, I think a lot of people are afraid of that because they don't think, they think they have to be perfect, but God has never required perfection out of anybody. There was only one man whose mission required perfection, and that was Jesus. The rest of us, it's not about that. God can work with your failure. Every major person that God has worked through, whether it be through the Bible or anybody that you've really met, if they're honest with you, are going to tell you about all of the failure and God, that's what grace is. Grace is so amazing to where God was trying to lead you in a different situation. God was telling you, stop playing the video game, you got responsibilities. Or God was telling you, don't spend the money on, uh, you know, going out to eat three times a day at lunch, you know, you have bills that you need to pay. So you have this inner voice that's leading you into the right path, and we don't always follow it. That was my situation for prison, but there's this force called grace to where when you make a mistake, God is such a loving creator. You have to we, we have to realize that he's on our side and just because he failed, he's not like, you know, imagine a father training his son how to ride a bike. And when he falls, you know, the first time he's riding and he falls after three feet to get the dad's just flipping out on him, telling him how dumb he is. No, that's not what happened. The dad's cheering him on because he made it three feet and he's cheering him on to get back on and go five feet. And go seven feet next time. It's okay, it's okay to fall down. It's okay to make a mistake. God can still work with that and he can turn something that seems terrible, even because of your own failure, and work it together for your good and for the people in your sphere of influence's good to where you're able to take that story and share it. Or like for me, I went to prison. I wasn't, that wasn't a part of my life. I had, I had forsaken crime, um, and walked away from, I had forsaken living in secret and making shady deals with people. Um, but there are things that I got out of that. You know, knowledge that I got that I never would have read some of these books. In fact, there were books that were handed to me and I was like, nah, I'm a Christian. I'm not, I'm not gonna, this is kind of how I was taught. No, I'm supposed to stay away from that. I'm not even going to read this, but there was a voice inside of me telling me, read it and extract the good, eat the meat and spit out the bones. Or, you know, so just get, get what resonates with me out of it. And if it doesn't resonate, just ignore it. And there, in some of these books that I read, changed my life and they were not Christian books. They were not, it was, in fact, I, there was a part of me that felt like I'm not supposed to read this, but I was led to read it and it changed my life. So, so there's good that can come out of situations. I wouldn't be talking to you today, um, we wouldn't know each other. I would have just kept on, I would have continued on in my life. I was happy where I was at, you know, uh, but it forced me to grow. And, and, and there's a lot of good and there's more good that's going to come out of it. And that's what God is going to do with your situation just because you take responsibility and you own up to the fact that it's you that got you where you are doesn't mean that God can't use that and still turn it around. Sometimes you're going to have to go through, sometimes you're, you're going to lose some stuff. You know, when you don't do everything you're supposed to do, if you lose your, maybe your marriage is, your, your marriage is going to be over, you know, maybe you are going to lose that job, maybe you are going to lose that car or your house because of decisions that you made, but it doesn't mean that God's abandoned you, and God can use that thing to grow you and to create a new fire in you that'll take you further than you ever would have, you ever would have gone had you not go through that learning experience of falling down on your face and making the mistake, you get back up and you keep going because even though you're limited and in your mind, you're limited, you have an unlimited God on your side, working on your behalf and yeah, it really is good news. And, but the thing is, is God's not going to save us from every uncomfortable situation. He's not, it's not about like living, just everything's going to be perfect from here on out. You know, you're in a fallen world. You know that there's adversity. You know that there is an enemy who roams about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. If you're a devourable, he's going to devour you. So you do recognize that there is an enemy, but you have a God on your side and you're going to come, come across trials and tribulations, but you're going to get the victory over it if you hold onto your faith and if you just stand back and you wait and you watch God perform on your, on your behalf, he always will. He'll always turn it around. And the worst case scenario for me, I believe the worst case scenario is I die and I get to go to heaven. So either way, if I die, worst case, the worst case scenario for me is I still win. You know, so I, I just believe that if God is on your side, that you always are going to win, eventually. Even in your failure, God can turn your failure around for a win.

I hear you. Well, Jonathan, dude, thank you so much for your insight, sharing your journey, your transformation, um, And how we can, you know, confront the fear and not go back to what we know that's helped us, you know, cope or medicate those addictions that we can find and take comfort in. Um, how can men outside of this podcast get in touch with you?

I am on all social medias through Facebook, Instagram. I'm even on YouTube., TheJonathanField and I have a website, sunstonecoaching.com, and you can stay in contact. You can follow me through Facebook or Instagram. I'm even on TikTok. All of them are under TheJonathanField, all one word. Reach out to me, like, subscribe, follow all that. And I'm always putting out content to encourage people going through the things that I went through, the things that I wish somebody would have been telling me when I was going through my struggles. That's pretty much all of my content.

Well, I appreciate it, my friend. And you know, that was the real struggle, right? Feeling lost and looking for the answer and now you're making it available. So I appreciate it, my friend. Thank you.

That's right. Thank you.