Secret Connection Between Your Gym Routine and Identity with Luke DePron

Mike Forrester: 00:00:01

Well, hello and welcome back my friend, man.

Mike Forrester: 00:00:04

Today I am totally excited to have Luke DePron join me from, uh, fit Men Project.

Mike Forrester: 00:00:11

And Luke is one of those that's able to give you a different

Mike Forrester: 00:00:14

perspective than maybe you've heard from other people, right?

Mike Forrester: 00:00:18

It's all the muscles and, and we just, you know, get fit

Mike Forrester: 00:00:22

through focusing on the muscles.

Mike Forrester: 00:00:24

There's nothing else that's even involved in it.

Mike Forrester: 00:00:28

Luke looks at it and helps us to see that both our external and our internal,

Mike Forrester: 00:00:35

you know, kind of image of who we are and how we show up are connected.

Mike Forrester: 00:00:40

And I don't know about you man, but you know, if I'm working on

Mike Forrester: 00:00:43

the, on the biceps, I wanna see like my internal biceps right, my

Mike Forrester: 00:00:47

confidence maybe come out and show up.

Mike Forrester: 00:00:50

It's one of those that I think we, we get so focused on the external, we forget

Mike Forrester: 00:00:55

about who we are at the core and how it can impact how we appear in life.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:00

So, totally stoked to get into the conversation with Luke, to dispel,

Mike Forrester: 00:01:04

you know, myths, we may believe, and, and to just really encourage

Mike Forrester: 00:01:08

and uplift, how we show up, how we feel about it, and being able to.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:13

To reap new rewards that we didn't think were possible for us.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:17

So Luke, how are you doing today, my friend?

Luke DePron: 00:01:19

I'm great.

Luke DePron: 00:01:20

It's, I always rub it in and say it's another sunny day in San

Luke DePron: 00:01:23

Diego, so I got no complaints, man.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:26

Yes.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:27

Sunny days are amazing, man.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:29

It's like, uh, you know, you, you get the opportunity to, to go to

Mike Forrester: 00:01:33

work and then go to the beach.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:35

Or go to the mountains.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:35

I mean, there's so much that's there.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:37

Um, you know, and I think.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:40

Being in San Diego is one of those things Lucas reflective of, you know, like life

Mike Forrester: 00:01:45

and, and the choices we make because I know so many people I, I lived there

Mike Forrester: 00:01:49

for, for many years and even moving away.

Mike Forrester: 00:01:53

And then when I go back it's crazy because, you know, there's, there's

Mike Forrester: 00:01:57

friends and family that live there and they go, yeah, I want to get to

Mike Forrester: 00:02:00

the beach, but I don't ever get there.

Luke DePron: 00:02:02

Sure.

Mike Forrester: 00:02:03

I don't know about you, man, but is that something like you, you

Mike Forrester: 00:02:06

see as well where it's like, Hey man, you're sitting right on the doorstep

Mike Forrester: 00:02:09

and people aren't taking action on, on going and doing what they enjoy.

Mike Forrester: 00:02:12

They just kind of get stuck in a rut?

Luke DePron: 00:02:14

Sure.

Luke DePron: 00:02:14

I think it's, yeah, it's, I mean, complacency is easy, right?

Luke DePron: 00:02:17

Um, myself included, can fall into that trap.

Luke DePron: 00:02:19

But in regards to the beach, I will be going this weekend.

Luke DePron: 00:02:22

So, you know, I'll make sure of that.

Luke DePron: 00:02:24

But, um, yeah, I think it's, I think it's very easy to.

Luke DePron: 00:02:27

Um, kind of find yourself in the lane that you've been in the rut,

Luke DePron: 00:02:32

if you wanna call it that, of life, um, the season that you're in.

Luke DePron: 00:02:34

And complacency is a real thing.

Luke DePron: 00:02:36

And yeah, you gotta be tactical and I think intentional about stepping

Luke DePron: 00:02:39

out, stretching that comfort zone and whether it's like something as

Luke DePron: 00:02:42

familiar as like, Hey, go do the fun beach thing that's right there.

Luke DePron: 00:02:44

Or go try, you know, new fun things

Mike Forrester: 00:02:48

Right, something.

Mike Forrester: 00:02:55

You know, their day to day or what they do, you know, as far as their goals or

Mike Forrester: 00:03:01

their habits, does it impact them at all?

Luke DePron: 00:03:03

I think the biggest thing is I think there's a massive

Luke DePron: 00:03:05

amount of confidence that is developed from simply trying new things.

Luke DePron: 00:03:10

Um, for a lot of guys, I think there's a lot of fear around, um, again, whether

Luke DePron: 00:03:15

it's, I mean, anything public speaking.

Luke DePron: 00:03:17

Um, again, I know you mentioned doing a 5K, but like if you literally just.

Luke DePron: 00:03:22

Except that there is growth in that discomfort and start to lean into

Luke DePron: 00:03:26

like, Hey, this is a little, you know, the hairs are standing up.

Luke DePron: 00:03:29

I'm a little bit scared, a little bit uncomfortable.

Luke DePron: 00:03:31

I think that's an awesome indicator of like, where to

Luke DePron: 00:03:33

lean in and like where to go.

Luke DePron: 00:03:35

Um, and I, and I think it'll uncover all sorts of potential

Luke DePron: 00:03:37

possibilities of like new fun things.

Luke DePron: 00:03:39

And I mean, that's your, that's your life, right?

Luke DePron: 00:03:41

Like all of these experiences that you've had, it's like you tried it

Luke DePron: 00:03:44

for the first time sometime, so who knows what other, you know, things

Luke DePron: 00:03:46

that you can go out and explore.

Mike Forrester: 00:03:49

It's often just like what you, I, I think what we imagine

Mike Forrester: 00:03:53

in our head is sometimes the stuff that holds us back when it's like,

Mike Forrester: 00:03:57

dude, I did go, you know, body surfing.

Mike Forrester: 00:04:01

You know what I mean?

Mike Forrester: 00:04:01

Yeah.

Mike Forrester: 00:04:02

Or tried surfing and it's that uncomfortable stuff.

Mike Forrester: 00:04:04

You're not sure, you know, assure of how to do it, but you take that chance, man.

Mike Forrester: 00:04:09

It's just, it can be the biggest thrill that.

Mike Forrester: 00:04:13

Was just sitting dormant and you had no idea.

Mike Forrester: 00:04:15

You're like, oh my gosh, I'm gonna like totally have the board hit me in the head

Mike Forrester: 00:04:18

and all these bad things are gonna happen when it's like, oh my gosh, I had a ride.

Mike Forrester: 00:04:22

Um, have you seen that kind of stuff like with your, your

Mike Forrester: 00:04:25

clients in, in their processes?

Luke DePron: 00:04:28

Yeah.

Luke DePron: 00:04:28

So, you know, obviously when guys come to work with me specifically,

Luke DePron: 00:04:31

we are, you know, talking, tackling health and, and fitness goals.

Luke DePron: 00:04:34

Um, but there is absolutely a, um, a stretching in the sense of.

Luke DePron: 00:04:40

Most of the guys I work with, they tend to be in the struggle season of that.

Luke DePron: 00:04:44

Um, they maybe don't have even a fitness program, so the idea of maybe going

Luke DePron: 00:04:49

to the gym itself can be intimidating.

Luke DePron: 00:04:51

Um, feeling like they have the time to even focus on their

Luke DePron: 00:04:54

nutrition can feel intimidating.

Luke DePron: 00:04:55

Um, the, the whole process often can feel so consumptive that.

Luke DePron: 00:05:01

They don't want to step in.

Luke DePron: 00:05:03

It feels like this overwhelming, like I have to completely revamp my life.

Luke DePron: 00:05:07

Quote.

Luke DePron: 00:05:07

We've heard it's a lifestyle, but nobody really explains what that means.

Luke DePron: 00:05:10

And so it really does feel often like this overwhelming, massive undertaking.

Luke DePron: 00:05:16

I'm about to go climb Mount Everest and work out every

Luke DePron: 00:05:19

day for the rest of my life.

Luke DePron: 00:05:21

And it's really helping guys kind of shift both the, the physiological

Luke DePron: 00:05:25

approach and obviously like their, their psychology around that and

Luke DePron: 00:05:27

understanding it doesn't have to be that they can integrate differently.

Mike Forrester: 00:05:31

Well, and I, I think that's one of those things, man.

Mike Forrester: 00:05:33

How many of us are kind of bought into that idea, Luke, where it's like, I

Mike Forrester: 00:05:38

have to do this monumental undertaking.

Mike Forrester: 00:05:41

Totally.

Mike Forrester: 00:05:42

Right.

Mike Forrester: 00:05:42

So instead of looking at, Hey, I, I want to gain 10 pounds, or

Mike Forrester: 00:05:47

I wanna lose 10 pounds, you know.

Mike Forrester: 00:05:50

It's, it's one of those I have to do a hundred pounds, you know what I'm saying?

Mike Forrester: 00:05:55

Like, it's, it's this larger than life goal.

Mike Forrester: 00:05:58

Yeah.

Mike Forrester: 00:05:58

And instead of just going, Hey, I'm gonna go twice a week.

Mike Forrester: 00:06:01

Yep.

Mike Forrester: 00:06:01

Twice a week to the gym, it's, I'm gonna go two hours every day, seven days a week.

Mike Forrester: 00:06:07

Which you don't have that kind of, gap.

Mike Forrester: 00:06:09

in your schedule.

Mike Forrester: 00:06:10

Right.

Mike Forrester: 00:06:10

You don't have the bandwidth.

Luke DePron: 00:06:11

And I can't, Mike.

Luke DePron: 00:06:12

Yeah.

Luke DePron: 00:06:12

I cannot tell you how many guys.

Luke DePron: 00:06:15

When I first chat with them, um, have that experience.

Luke DePron: 00:06:20

So every person I work with, they go through a pretty lengthy

Luke DePron: 00:06:23

intake form and I ask like, how many days can you realistically

Luke DePron: 00:06:27

dedicate to 45 minutes of exercise?

Luke DePron: 00:06:29

I can't tell you how many guys have put seven.

Luke DePron: 00:06:32

And the reality is if that was true, you probably wouldn't be on a call with me

Luke DePron: 00:06:35

to maybe help rectify and get you back.

Luke DePron: 00:06:38

In the state of health there is this massive, massive gap in understanding

Luke DePron: 00:06:44

on what's actually required and what guys think they have to do.

Luke DePron: 00:06:48

And it oftentimes is what's stopping so many guys from jumping in.

Luke DePron: 00:06:53

Um.

Luke DePron: 00:06:54

And take an action because you realistically don't need to

Luke DePron: 00:06:57

work out seven days per week.

Luke DePron: 00:06:58

We need to be active most days, but we don't need to actually exercise.

Luke DePron: 00:07:02

Majority of my clients.

Luke DePron: 00:07:03

Don't go to a gym.

Luke DePron: 00:07:04

We set up a home gym.

Luke DePron: 00:07:06

So the biggest mistake I see guys make is they're trying to

Luke DePron: 00:07:10

rectify a challenge in their life, their health and their fitness.

Luke DePron: 00:07:13

By making it more challenging, they think that there's gonna be some massive growth.

Luke DePron: 00:07:18

If they go do this really hard program and they're gonna come out

Luke DePron: 00:07:21

the other side transformed, I'm gonna sign up and do a marathon.

Luke DePron: 00:07:24

Oftentimes you're gonna be a guy who five years later is telling people

Luke DePron: 00:07:28

about the marathon you did one time.

Luke DePron: 00:07:30

And if we're truly gonna make lifelong changes where our health and our fitness

Luke DePron: 00:07:34

and our wellness, wellness is at, at the forefront, we have to figure out a way.

Luke DePron: 00:07:38

How do we remove barriers to entry?

Luke DePron: 00:07:39

How do we make this feel easier to do?

Luke DePron: 00:07:42

And.

Luke DePron: 00:07:43

That's kind of at odds with what most guys are gonna come across when they're

Luke DePron: 00:07:46

trying to rectify the situation.

Luke DePron: 00:07:47

You hop on Instagram, you're gonna see the craziest workouts

Luke DePron: 00:07:51

that rise to the top, right?

Luke DePron: 00:07:52

Like people are creating content to go viral.

Luke DePron: 00:07:55

You're gonna see the most nonsensical diets rise to the top because

Luke DePron: 00:07:58

it's, you know, um, flashy to say like, I'm only eating just steak,

Luke DePron: 00:08:02

or I'm only eating raw, and.

Luke DePron: 00:08:05

The extremes really do rise to the top, but it's not where most

Luke DePron: 00:08:08

suc most success is gonna lie.

Luke DePron: 00:08:10

Lie for guys.

Luke DePron: 00:08:11

So ultimately, if we can scale things back, make it more accessible,

Luke DePron: 00:08:14

it's probably gonna give you better physiological outcomes anyway.

Luke DePron: 00:08:19

But for sure we're gonna create a whole different internal environment

Luke DePron: 00:08:23

where we're gonna start to actually see some internal success.

Luke DePron: 00:08:26

Um, we're gonna start to build some confidence through competence by

Luke DePron: 00:08:28

actually hitting these targeted objectives of, like you said, Hey,

Luke DePron: 00:08:31

I'm gonna work out twice per week.

Luke DePron: 00:08:33

It is so much more impactful and empowering that if you set a goal of

Luke DePron: 00:08:36

I'm gonna work out twice per week, and you did that for three months,

Luke DePron: 00:08:40

then this idea that you're gonna work out every day and then constantly

Luke DePron: 00:08:43

restarting that goal over and over.

Mike Forrester: 00:08:47

So is it rather than having like that monumental,

Mike Forrester: 00:08:51

goal or task, that's intimidating.

Mike Forrester: 00:08:53

Is it just showing up with something that's realistic and a little

Mike Forrester: 00:08:57

bit of out of our comfort zone?

Mike Forrester: 00:09:00

Is that where we're gonna get the, the better results?

Mike Forrester: 00:09:03

Yeah.

Luke DePron: 00:09:04

So say using like that a hundred goal, a hundred pound mark.

Luke DePron: 00:09:07

When someone has a hundred pounds to lose, like that's a

Luke DePron: 00:09:09

significant amount of weight.

Luke DePron: 00:09:11

The reason it's gonna be so important to take these like really realistic kind

Luke DePron: 00:09:15

of objectives and like, yes, we wanna stretch and push ourselves and we do set

Luke DePron: 00:09:19

stretch goals, but we set also what's called guaranteed minimum standards.

Luke DePron: 00:09:21

And I'll, and I'll touch on this here in a second, but you have to understand

Luke DePron: 00:09:24

that if you're a guy who's a hundred pounds overweight and you lose fif,

Luke DePron: 00:09:27

you lose 30 pounds, which is an incredible amount of weight to lose.

Luke DePron: 00:09:31

You're still gonna look in the mirror and be like, wow, I'm still pretty overweight.

Luke DePron: 00:09:34

And objectively you probably are.

Luke DePron: 00:09:36

So if.

Luke DePron: 00:09:38

To lose that 25 or 30 pounds.

Luke DePron: 00:09:40

You took an approach that you thought, oh my God, that was the worst diet.

Luke DePron: 00:09:45

I can't believe I did all of that exercise.

Luke DePron: 00:09:47

I've worked with somebody before.

Luke DePron: 00:09:48

They're like, I can't believe I only lost six pounds in two weeks.

Luke DePron: 00:09:52

And I'm like, that's an incredible amount of weight to lose.

Luke DePron: 00:09:55

There's such a misunderstanding.

Luke DePron: 00:09:56

I'm like, how fast things can go.

Luke DePron: 00:09:58

And so if the intensity that you put into this doesn't match

Luke DePron: 00:10:02

the results you're gonna get.

Luke DePron: 00:10:04

Dissuaded from continuing.

Luke DePron: 00:10:06

And when the task does feel so big, like again, a hundred pounds and you

Luke DePron: 00:10:10

just worked your butt off and you've lost 30 pounds, which is again an

Luke DePron: 00:10:13

incredible amount of weight, but you look in the mirror and you still see

Luke DePron: 00:10:16

the fat, overweight guy, yeah, you're gonna be like, it's not worth it.

Luke DePron: 00:10:20

Versus anytime I'm on a coaching call with a client, I ask him,

Luke DePron: 00:10:24

this is anything we're doing.

Luke DePron: 00:10:26

Feeling hard or heavy.

Luke DePron: 00:10:28

And I, when I say harder, I, I remove one thing.

Luke DePron: 00:10:31

I want your workouts to feel hard.

Luke DePron: 00:10:32

They're gonna be physically feeling hard when you're doing them, but more.

Luke DePron: 00:10:36

Collectively, does it feel hard or emotionally heavy,

Luke DePron: 00:10:39

this task that we're doing?

Luke DePron: 00:10:41

And the answer has to be no.

Luke DePron: 00:10:42

And guys are like, no, it's actually feeling pretty manageable and easy.

Luke DePron: 00:10:47

And it's like, what a different experience for guys to step into.

Luke DePron: 00:10:50

It's like, sweet.

Luke DePron: 00:10:50

So you just lost 30 pounds and you did it in a weigh that, did you say it felt.

Luke DePron: 00:10:54

Kind of easy.

Luke DePron: 00:10:55

Again, they're working really hard when they do the workout, but from

Luke DePron: 00:10:58

like a lifestyle management and how we interact in, integrate basically our

Luke DePron: 00:11:02

nutrition, our exercise, our lifestyle, our mindset, all of those things, it's

Luke DePron: 00:11:06

gotta come more from a place of ease.

Luke DePron: 00:11:08

There are seasons in life where it makes sense that like, I'm gonna go

Luke DePron: 00:11:11

really push things, but you don't tune.

Luke DePron: 00:11:14

You don't.

Luke DePron: 00:11:15

You tune up the Jeep to take it off road.

Luke DePron: 00:11:17

You don't go take it off road to tune it up.

Luke DePron: 00:11:20

And so if you really think about setting some foundational pieces in your health

Luke DePron: 00:11:24

and fitness, getting yourself in a higher level of, of, of, um, health and

Luke DePron: 00:11:28

fitness, it opens up a per a plethora of like opportunity of what you can go do.

Luke DePron: 00:11:33

You wanna come, you wanna go hike, you wanna do, uh, orienteering.

Luke DePron: 00:11:36

If you wanna do jiujitsu, which I like to do.

Luke DePron: 00:11:39

Like you can find all of these things, but you don't have to start there.

Luke DePron: 00:11:42

You gotta start with some baseline stuff.

Luke DePron: 00:11:44

Yeah.

Mike Forrester: 00:11:45

It sounds like rather than just looking at, Hey, I'm

Mike Forrester: 00:11:48

constrained to going and working out at the gym, there's a lot of other options.

Mike Forrester: 00:11:54

And so as I come to you, it'd be like, Hey, Mike, what are you interested in?

Mike Forrester: 00:12:00

And so they, they can align.

Mike Forrester: 00:12:02

Is that right?

Luke DePron: 00:12:04

Totally.

Luke DePron: 00:12:05

The piece that we do integrate with pretty much every is we're gonna bring a strength

Luke DePron: 00:12:07

training program into the lifestyle.

Luke DePron: 00:12:10

There's just too much value to shy away from that.

Luke DePron: 00:12:12

Again, we can strip it down, we can make it more basic,

Luke DePron: 00:12:15

we can make it simpler to do.

Luke DePron: 00:12:17

Like I mentioned, a lot of my clients are gonna use home gyms, office gyms.

Luke DePron: 00:12:20

We're gonna remove that 20 minute drive to and to and from the gym.

Luke DePron: 00:12:23

And that 40 minutes of travel time, we could have already got it done after that.

Luke DePron: 00:12:28

When we talk low level movement, we use step count, um, often

Luke DePron: 00:12:32

to, um, as a lever point.

Luke DePron: 00:12:34

Specifically, if we're talking weight loss, that's gonna be a really, really

Luke DePron: 00:12:37

useful tool, but we don't need to jump in the deep end there either.

Luke DePron: 00:12:41

So if it's somebody who it's like, let's audit where you're at.

Luke DePron: 00:12:44

Okay, you're taking 2000 steps on average, do you need to go

Luke DePron: 00:12:47

to 15,000 or two or 20,000?

Luke DePron: 00:12:49

Absolutely not.

Luke DePron: 00:12:50

Maybe we can bring you up to 6,000.

Luke DePron: 00:12:51

Still seeing an effective rate of change where doing more probably isn't gonna move

Luke DePron: 00:12:56

the needle any faster, and we want it.

Luke DePron: 00:12:58

Stop there, and then, yeah.

Luke DePron: 00:13:01

Can we do it in a way that you enjoy it?

Luke DePron: 00:13:03

Is that like going out and shooting hoops with your kid versus, all

Luke DePron: 00:13:07

right, dad's gotta go get on the treadmill to get his steps in.

Luke DePron: 00:13:11

And it's like, maybe it's walking the dog, maybe it's going for a bike ride.

Luke DePron: 00:13:15

How can we integrate some physical activity in a way that you actually

Luke DePron: 00:13:19

enjoy to turn this into a lifestyle?

Mike Forrester: 00:13:22

And, and the way you said that with, uh, I've

Mike Forrester: 00:13:24

gotta go, you know, do this.

Mike Forrester: 00:13:27

Um, does that kind of a mindset, does that get in the way of

Mike Forrester: 00:13:34

the success that we're after?

Mike Forrester: 00:13:35

I mean, does it create like unnecessary create hurdles or, or make it harder

Mike Forrester: 00:13:41

to get to our goal just because we're, you know, looking at it

Mike Forrester: 00:13:45

wrong Is mindset like kind of that.

Mike Forrester: 00:13:48

Secret.

Luke DePron: 00:13:49

Yeah.

Mike Forrester: 00:13:49

Key to, to finding the success.

Mike Forrester: 00:13:51

Sure.

Luke DePron: 00:13:51

Um, and so when I think of mindset and I kinda have like a

Luke DePron: 00:13:55

specific protocol I take guys through on this where a lot of guys are

Luke DePron: 00:13:59

gonna have a challenge if say you're somebody who has been overweight

Luke DePron: 00:14:03

for you could be all of your life.

Luke DePron: 00:14:06

This has been a life.

Luke DePron: 00:14:07

There's guys, this has been a lifelong challenge.

Luke DePron: 00:14:10

That identity is in there, right?

Luke DePron: 00:14:12

Like that, that guy's probably said things like, you know, I've, well, I've

Luke DePron: 00:14:14

always been an overweight guy, or I'm an all in all or all out kind of guy,

Luke DePron: 00:14:19

and we have created these identities and these self schemas and we're

Luke DePron: 00:14:24

going to have to break free of them and tactically create some new ones.

Luke DePron: 00:14:28

And we don't just do it through journaling or just like hoping that like, Hey,

Luke DePron: 00:14:32

I, I'm gonna be this different guy.

Luke DePron: 00:14:34

We can be really strategic in how we create this version of ourselves.

Luke DePron: 00:14:37

And so, um.

Luke DePron: 00:14:39

In the Fitment project, I kind of take people through this, this process

Luke DePron: 00:14:41

where the first is like, well, let's identify like what is your big why?

Luke DePron: 00:14:44

Like what's the, what's like the real reason that you want to do this?

Luke DePron: 00:14:47

And I know me and you, Mike spoke and legacy was something that

Luke DePron: 00:14:49

you spoke about earlier and I was like, that's such a great word.

Luke DePron: 00:14:52

Because you know, hey, the doctor said I need to lose 20 pounds.

Luke DePron: 00:14:55

It's probably not gonna get you anywhere.

Luke DePron: 00:14:57

But I love when I get to work with dads and it's like, I'll

Luke DePron: 00:15:00

throw this question at 'em.

Luke DePron: 00:15:01

Especially when they have a daughter.

Luke DePron: 00:15:02

It's like, this is a golden opportunity.

Luke DePron: 00:15:04

The question.

Luke DePron: 00:15:05

Are you or another guy gonna walk your daughter down the

Luke DePron: 00:15:08

aisle on her wedding day?

Luke DePron: 00:15:10

And it's like, is everything that you're doing ensuring that

Luke DePron: 00:15:13

the answer is actually you?

Luke DePron: 00:15:15

And like, if we can create and step into something bigger than

Luke DePron: 00:15:18

ourselves, how we show up as a dad.

Luke DePron: 00:15:20

Are you the dad?

Luke DePron: 00:15:20

Like place catch with your kid or do you park orders from the lawn chair?

Luke DePron: 00:15:24

How do you get to show up as a, as a husband or as a,

Luke DePron: 00:15:27

um, you a spouse to where.

Luke DePron: 00:15:30

When your partner or your wife wants to go for a walk, are you actually too

Luke DePron: 00:15:34

tired or are you actually too busy?

Luke DePron: 00:15:35

Or can you go do it?

Luke DePron: 00:15:37

And so tapping into something bigger than yourself can be an incredibly powerful

Luke DePron: 00:15:41

motivator in the short term, and we wanna leverage that as many times as we can.

Luke DePron: 00:15:45

But from there, we're going to intentionally create our new identity.

Luke DePron: 00:15:50

And so.

Luke DePron: 00:15:51

Typically we just attach fit to whatever they have.

Luke DePron: 00:15:53

Hey, let's be the fit dad.

Luke DePron: 00:15:54

Let's be the fit entrepreneur.

Luke DePron: 00:15:56

And we need to start making decisions through that

Luke DePron: 00:15:59

identity and through that lens.

Luke DePron: 00:16:01

And we do that with a lot of intention around specific hard lines.

Luke DePron: 00:16:05

So as an example.

Luke DePron: 00:16:07

I was recently working with a a client and I'm like, Hey, we're gonna intentionally

Luke DePron: 00:16:11

set some hard lines that are kind of on the fringes of either where you would

Luke DePron: 00:16:15

maybe have a stumbling block, like, Hey, when I travel for work, or I, you know,

Luke DePron: 00:16:19

I go to happy hour and I drink too much.

Luke DePron: 00:16:21

So we wanna put these hard lines kind of on the fringes of those.

Luke DePron: 00:16:24

And so like him, one of his hard lines became, I don't eat kids food.

Luke DePron: 00:16:29

I, the fit dad, don't eat kids food.

Luke DePron: 00:16:31

I the fit dad who's showing my daughter, who is ensuring that my,

Luke DePron: 00:16:36

I'm gonna be there for my daughter on her wedding day, doesn't eat kid food.

Luke DePron: 00:16:40

And that was a really easy way to, to put a hard line back it up with the

Luke DePron: 00:16:44

identity, drive it through the motivation to stop a behavior that for this guy

Luke DePron: 00:16:48

was a place where he just had a level of overconsumption that was kind of mindless.

Luke DePron: 00:16:52

'cause it's like, oh, I'm gonna grab some goldfish crackers, or I'm

Luke DePron: 00:16:54

gonna clean the plate from the kid.

Luke DePron: 00:16:56

And boom, we just remove that.

Luke DePron: 00:16:58

Um, we've done that through with alcohol, with guys setting hard lines on like

Luke DePron: 00:17:01

where the number of, of drinks, what we drink, how we drink, um, and that

Luke DePron: 00:17:06

can be a really, really powerful way to intentionally pr, uh, improve your

Luke DePron: 00:17:11

confidence through proving competence.

Luke DePron: 00:17:13

Not just saying like, I'm hoping I'm gonna change.

Luke DePron: 00:17:15

Like no, you're proving it to yourself.

Luke DePron: 00:17:17

You reflect on it.

Luke DePron: 00:17:18

At the end of the week, like, yeah, I said I was gonna do three

Luke DePron: 00:17:20

workouts, I got three workouts done.

Luke DePron: 00:17:23

And we emotionally have to celebrate that.

Luke DePron: 00:17:25

So many guys struggle with that, Mike.

Luke DePron: 00:17:27

They struggle to celebrate a win positively.

Luke DePron: 00:17:29

It sounds like this.

Luke DePron: 00:17:30

And I, I imagine somebody listening to this will, this will make sense.

Luke DePron: 00:17:34

Well, I did.

Luke DePron: 00:17:35

Like, celebrate your three, win your three workouts.

Luke DePron: 00:17:37

Well, I did three workouts, but you know, I could have done four.

Luke DePron: 00:17:39

And it's like, get outta here with the coulda.

Luke DePron: 00:17:41

Let's, I'm like, dude, you are a freaking stud.

Luke DePron: 00:17:44

You are a freaking stud for nailing those three workouts that you said

Luke DePron: 00:17:47

you were gonna do, and now you're becoming a congruent man who does

Luke DePron: 00:17:50

what he said he was gonna do.

Luke DePron: 00:17:52

And over the, the, the process of going through this, and again, executing on this

Luke DePron: 00:17:56

idea of minimum standards where it kind of feels tangible and easy, you come out

Luke DePron: 00:18:00

the other side and you're like, Hey, I am.

Luke DePron: 00:18:04

I'm fit, Mike and I do make these decisions and all of a sudden decision

Luke DePron: 00:18:07

fatigue isn't there and it gets to be an easy way to kind of navigate life.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:10

as you're talking about this, I'm almost seeing like,

Mike Forrester: 00:18:13

you know when you go bowling and they put the bumpers up on the side?

Mike Forrester: 00:18:16

Yeah, it's exactly it.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:17

You're ensuring.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:18

It's not like you're saying, Hey Mike, this is gonna be perfect,

Mike Forrester: 00:18:22

but you're saying we're gonna keep things going towards the goal.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:26

Yep.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:27

Uh, we just have these guardrails, these bumpers to keep you on track.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:31

Totally.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:32

Uh, and, and that's where I'm like, I. Dude.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:35

Ha.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:35

Knowing that I have permission not to be perfect, I think

Mike Forrester: 00:18:39

puts me in a much better place.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:41

And I know it does for other men as well, where it's like, Hey, I

Mike Forrester: 00:18:44

don't have to worry about a misstep.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:46

It doesn't mean the end of the world.

Mike Forrester: 00:18:48

Yep.

Luke DePron: 00:18:49

that's a huge one that guys have to recognize in particularly

Luke DePron: 00:18:53

the health and fitness space.

Luke DePron: 00:18:55

So right now everybody has probably heard of 75 hard, um mm-hmm.

Luke DePron: 00:19:00

It's two workouts a day for 75 days, the same diet for 75 days,

Luke DePron: 00:19:04

and your picture and your water.

Luke DePron: 00:19:06

And um, there's many guys that have incredible, incredible experiences

Luke DePron: 00:19:10

and transformations from it.

Luke DePron: 00:19:11

But I've also met many guys who I'm like, cool, you're on the seventh round of it

Luke DePron: 00:19:14

and you're still a type two diabetic.

Luke DePron: 00:19:16

Like, do you wanna solve the actual problem?

Luke DePron: 00:19:19

Locking up and doing something for 75 days or 50 days means far

Luke DePron: 00:19:24

less than figuring out how do I navigate this as a true lifestyle

Luke DePron: 00:19:28

for the next one year, two years.

Luke DePron: 00:19:29

Three years.

Luke DePron: 00:19:31

And with that, there is going to be seasons of life.

Luke DePron: 00:19:34

There is going to be variability, there's gonna be work, travel,

Luke DePron: 00:19:36

there's gonna be vacations.

Luke DePron: 00:19:38

And something I always do convey to, to guys, when I'm working

Luke DePron: 00:19:41

with them, um, oftentimes they're gonna, you know, a ow on me.

Luke DePron: 00:19:45

I'm a, well you're, you're an athlete, a fitness guy.

Luke DePron: 00:19:48

And, and yeah, I'll own that identity.

Luke DePron: 00:19:50

I've, I've built into that.

Luke DePron: 00:19:51

Sure.

Luke DePron: 00:19:52

But what they don't understand, or I have to let them know, I'm like.

Luke DePron: 00:19:55

I'll eat all the cookies.

Luke DePron: 00:19:58

Like, how many cookies do you want?

Luke DePron: 00:19:59

Well, how many do you have?

Luke DePron: 00:20:01

And recognizing that, like, I have that same struggle,

Luke DePron: 00:20:05

um, I'm gonna miss workouts.

Luke DePron: 00:20:07

The difference is I've been in this game long enough that I can stretch it out

Luke DePron: 00:20:13

and understand the consequences of one missed, um, workout or one bad meal.

Luke DePron: 00:20:19

Um, whereas most guys, when they're just starting out, they've

Luke DePron: 00:20:21

created this massive consequence.

Luke DePron: 00:20:24

To negative actions, but they don't ever, ever give the same

Luke DePron: 00:20:27

weight to a positive action.

Luke DePron: 00:20:30

And you never eat a salad and think, wow, what a transformative health

Luke DePron: 00:20:35

experience I just had yet, you'll eat one too many cookies and you'll berate

Luke DePron: 00:20:42

yourself and think you blew your results.

Luke DePron: 00:20:44

And we have to step back and realize.

Luke DePron: 00:20:46

Your health, your physique, your energy, your fitness, it's gonna

Luke DePron: 00:20:50

be the summation of your actions stretch over a longer period of time.

Luke DePron: 00:20:53

So how do we make staying in that game easier for that longer period of time?

Mike Forrester: 00:20:57

Yeah, it's, it's definitely one of those

Mike Forrester: 00:20:59

of, it's all or nothing.

Mike Forrester: 00:21:02

I'm either total success or a total failure.

Mike Forrester: 00:21:05

And I think many of us as guys, we lean towards.

Mike Forrester: 00:21:09

Seeing ourselves in more in that total failure camp.

Mike Forrester: 00:21:13

I think we're more likely to self-sabotage, you know, than

Mike Forrester: 00:21:17

we are to correct course.

Mike Forrester: 00:21:19

So how, how do guys see that, hey, yes, I am on the self-sabotage train.

Mike Forrester: 00:21:27

You know, they're thinking that way, or their actions and behavior.

Mike Forrester: 00:21:31

How do they catch themselves to then be able to course correct.

Mike Forrester: 00:21:36

To get back into action on the right path that's been set out and then,

Mike Forrester: 00:21:43

and get some towards their goal.

Luke DePron: 00:21:44

So I think this is where you do have to have a level of auditing,

Luke DePron: 00:21:48

um, particularly in the beginning.

Luke DePron: 00:21:50

And obviously in my world that would be around particularly nutrition, obviously

Luke DePron: 00:21:54

exercise, and then low level movement.

Luke DePron: 00:21:56

So a lot of guys don't really.

Luke DePron: 00:21:58

Um, there's a lack of awareness on like, what they're actually doing.

Luke DePron: 00:22:01

So it could be a weekly reflection.

Luke DePron: 00:22:02

Obviously in my world, that becomes a weekly check-in sheet

Luke DePron: 00:22:04

to really take inventory of like, what did we actually do?

Luke DePron: 00:22:08

Because oftentimes it's not maybe as cataclysmic as most guys thought.

Luke DePron: 00:22:11

Um, so this could be again, you know, having your weekly weight average

Luke DePron: 00:22:15

and understanding like, okay man.

Luke DePron: 00:22:16

So you felt like you ate too much that day.

Luke DePron: 00:22:18

Cool.

Luke DePron: 00:22:18

Well, guess what?

Luke DePron: 00:22:20

Um, you still lost 1.2 pounds this week.

Luke DePron: 00:22:23

Fantastic.

Luke DePron: 00:22:24

Yeah.

Luke DePron: 00:22:24

Um, so I do think.

Luke DePron: 00:22:25

Auditing and having a level of awareness of, of tangible numbers

Luke DePron: 00:22:30

is super helpful in the beginning.

Luke DePron: 00:22:32

And then if we do find ourselves consistently in that like sabotage

Luke DePron: 00:22:36

land where we're not actually holding the line, then we shift those

Luke DePron: 00:22:42

guaranteed minimum standard down.

Luke DePron: 00:22:44

And so again, from a workout standpoint, it's like.

Luke DePron: 00:22:47

I had a guy, um, recently who, when he started, uh, we started

Luke DePron: 00:22:52

working together, he goes, well, my wife, uh, is going to, uh, give

Luke DePron: 00:22:57

birth to her baby like any day now.

Luke DePron: 00:22:59

I go, oh, like when's she do?

Luke DePron: 00:23:00

He is like, no, I could be today.

Luke DePron: 00:23:02

And I go, oh, wow, okay.

Luke DePron: 00:23:03

And I'm like, very cool that you jumped in because he actually waited

Luke DePron: 00:23:06

a whole year and finally emailed me and goes, I'm sick of my, uh, my crap.

Luke DePron: 00:23:11

and he was ready to go.

Luke DePron: 00:23:13

For a guy like that, it's like, man, you're, and he has two other children.

Luke DePron: 00:23:17

It's like, it's gonna be two young kids.

Luke DePron: 00:23:19

He is gonna have a third.

Luke DePron: 00:23:19

And it's like, it's gonna be so easy, so easy.

Luke DePron: 00:23:23

Like that's not an excuse.

Luke DePron: 00:23:24

That's like a real tangible bandwidth limitation.

Luke DePron: 00:23:28

So let's scale this way back, like does it need to just be one

Luke DePron: 00:23:31

workout per week that we execute on?

Luke DePron: 00:23:34

That we, that we, when I say judge, um, that we validate it on.

Luke DePron: 00:23:38

Now we can always stretch it.

Luke DePron: 00:23:40

We can have a stretch goal, but we don't need to.

Luke DePron: 00:23:42

Judge the stretch goal, but for him it was two workouts a week.

Luke DePron: 00:23:46

And so at any time if you find yourself struggling where you're like, man, I

Luke DePron: 00:23:49

just can't be consistent, pull it back.

Luke DePron: 00:23:51

Pull it all the way down until you can prove that you can be

Luke DePron: 00:23:54

consistent, like literally.

Luke DePron: 00:23:56

And this is James.

Luke DePron: 00:23:57

Clear.

Luke DePron: 00:23:57

I'm sure people here listening to this have heard of James Clear.

Luke DePron: 00:24:00

You could pull it all the way to the back, that you could be proud of yourself,

Luke DePron: 00:24:02

that you put your gym shoes out three days a week, solemn didn't go to the

Luke DePron: 00:24:06

gym, but you pulled those gym shoes out.

Luke DePron: 00:24:07

Like if that's what it's gonna take to get to you to celebrate

Luke DePron: 00:24:10

success, that you're having some momentum and then you bring it up.

Luke DePron: 00:24:15

The worst thing guys do, I'm telling you is they try to

Luke DePron: 00:24:17

pull all the levers at once.

Luke DePron: 00:24:18

I'm gonna go get 15,000 steps, I'm gonna go work out six days

Luke DePron: 00:24:22

per week, you're gonna burn out.

Luke DePron: 00:24:24

And then on top of it, you've wasted all your leverage that when

Luke DePron: 00:24:27

things do physiologically slow, we don't have any more things to add.

Luke DePron: 00:24:30

'cause you threw everything added at once.

Mike Forrester: 00:24:33

what is like something that, you know,

Mike Forrester: 00:24:35

when you're meeting with guys.

Mike Forrester: 00:24:38

First taking 'em through like your intake form, right?

Mike Forrester: 00:24:41

And you're having that conversation.

Mike Forrester: 00:24:43

What is it that guys set up as far as, you know, my family takes all my time.

Mike Forrester: 00:24:49

I don't have any time with work.

Mike Forrester: 00:24:51

Like what are excuses that guys throw up that it's, it should be a different

Mike Forrester: 00:24:57

perspective that's maybe motivating us to work on our health instead of being the

Mike Forrester: 00:25:02

reason why we don't work on our health.

Luke DePron: 00:25:04

Sure.

Luke DePron: 00:25:05

Um, time is a huge one.

Luke DePron: 00:25:07

Again, I think this is a misunderstanding of how much time's

Luke DePron: 00:25:11

actually required to make progress.

Luke DePron: 00:25:14

And of course, understanding that you're just gonna have to make, um, progress

Luke DePron: 00:25:18

within the bandwidth that you have.

Luke DePron: 00:25:20

So would it be better if you could dedicate more time to this?

Luke DePron: 00:25:23

Okay, sure.

Luke DePron: 00:25:24

But can we make progress with the bandwidth that you do have?

Luke DePron: 00:25:27

How can we, um, introduce as many catalysts as possible

Luke DePron: 00:25:30

to remove these barriers?

Luke DePron: 00:25:31

And again, I use this one.

Luke DePron: 00:25:33

But it's like if every time that you get home it's instant like dad time

Luke DePron: 00:25:39

and your kids are just boom on you and you're like, ah, I need to get

Luke DePron: 00:25:41

to the basement and do that workout.

Luke DePron: 00:25:43

Cool man.

Luke DePron: 00:25:43

Let's grab an adjustable bench, some adjustable dumbbells.

Luke DePron: 00:25:46

They're gonna fold up and sit in a two foot corner of your office

Luke DePron: 00:25:50

and you're gonna get a 20 minute workout in before you leave.

Luke DePron: 00:25:53

And like, we're gonna budget that into the day.

Luke DePron: 00:25:55

Um, how do we get our, oh, we don't have time to get step count up.

Luke DePron: 00:25:58

Cool.

Luke DePron: 00:25:58

How many Zoom call or do you take calls during the day?

Luke DePron: 00:26:01

Oh, great.

Luke DePron: 00:26:01

They're not Zoom, they're headphones in.

Luke DePron: 00:26:03

We're gonna jailhouse pace, so we're gonna figure out how do we add steps in?

Luke DePron: 00:26:07

This is stuff I do, by the way.

Luke DePron: 00:26:09

Okay.

Luke DePron: 00:26:09

Um, and so again, it is about how do we add in to your lifestyle

Luke DePron: 00:26:13

before we have to really add on?

Luke DePron: 00:26:16

And so many guys, um.

Luke DePron: 00:26:18

They're gonna look at the time piece and just be like, I just don't know

Luke DePron: 00:26:21

where I'm gonna do it because I gotta workout seven days per week.

Luke DePron: 00:26:24

It's an hour a day.

Luke DePron: 00:26:25

I'm gonna have to prep all my meals.

Luke DePron: 00:26:27

That, and it's like, it doesn't have to be all that you're already eating.

Luke DePron: 00:26:29

We're gonna make subtly different choices, right?

Luke DePron: 00:26:32

Like that's not an add in, or excuse me, that's not an add-on.

Luke DePron: 00:26:35

You already eat.

Luke DePron: 00:26:36

We're gonna just make subtly different choices.

Luke DePron: 00:26:38

Um, we're gonna figure out how to squeeze movement in, in a way that you don't

Luke DePron: 00:26:41

notice, and then we're gonna dumb down the exercise to the minimal effective dose.

Luke DePron: 00:26:46

The value add of doing that from more energy, better sleep, more confidence

Luke DePron: 00:26:52

looking better, legit health markers, being up longer lifespan is going to

Luke DePron: 00:26:57

be such a value add that you, the time cost is inconsequential at that point.

Luke DePron: 00:27:05

The other one, and this is a time bandwidth thing, is kids, kids become I,

Luke DePron: 00:27:10

and it's wild to me, and I will say this as somebody who does not have children,

Luke DePron: 00:27:14

and yet the majority of my clients do.

Luke DePron: 00:27:18

It's very interesting that for some the kids are going

Luke DePron: 00:27:22

to be the reason they can't.

Luke DePron: 00:27:24

And for another, they will be the reason they can.

Luke DePron: 00:27:28

And that is a choice.

Luke DePron: 00:27:29

And I've watched guys.

Luke DePron: 00:27:31

Probably the last, I've had like four guys recently.

Luke DePron: 00:27:33

They all have three kids, three or four kids under the age of 12.

Luke DePron: 00:27:37

And it's like, and they're still making it happen.

Luke DePron: 00:27:41

So it becomes the driver.

Luke DePron: 00:27:44

It's like it becomes to steal your word legacy.

Luke DePron: 00:27:47

Um, had a gentleman who his goal was to, in the generational trauma

Luke DePron: 00:27:51

of alcoholism in his family.

Luke DePron: 00:27:53

And his dad, when we wrapped up our coaching program, got diagnosed with

Luke DePron: 00:27:58

terminal liver disease and which is obviously devastating for him,

Luke DePron: 00:28:03

but is also a gift to his daughters because his daughters will never

Luke DePron: 00:28:06

feel that pain that he felt because that ended with him and that happened

Luke DePron: 00:28:10

because he had those daughters.

Luke DePron: 00:28:12

So it can be your core driver or it can be the quote, barrier slash excuse.

Mike Forrester: 00:28:19

So when you look at the guys that are using.

Mike Forrester: 00:28:22

Their children as an excuse versus the ones that are using

Mike Forrester: 00:28:25

their children as a motivator.

Mike Forrester: 00:28:27

What at its core, like when you look below that basic reason,

Mike Forrester: 00:28:33

like what's the difference?

Mike Forrester: 00:28:36

That's, you know, then funneling up to be like, Hey, I can't because my kids

Mike Forrester: 00:28:41

versus I'm going to because of my kids.

Luke DePron: 00:28:44

I think that the majority of guys who struggle.

Luke DePron: 00:28:48

Have a deep seated belief through, um, proving that story correct, that they

Luke DePron: 00:28:54

can't be successful in this arena.

Luke DePron: 00:28:56

I haven't worked with somebody who's never tried to fix the situation.

Luke DePron: 00:29:00

Right.

Luke DePron: 00:29:01

It's not like I've worked with a guy that's like, yeah, I've

Luke DePron: 00:29:03

never tried to address this.

Luke DePron: 00:29:04

It's like every, every guy's tried to work out before tried some

Luke DePron: 00:29:07

diet or like, yeah, I tried this.

Luke DePron: 00:29:08

You know?

Luke DePron: 00:29:09

And so they're lacking this kind of fundamental belief that they can be

Luke DePron: 00:29:14

successful in this arena, and partially because they've proved it true and.

Luke DePron: 00:29:19

We usually have to kinda have a conversation around

Luke DePron: 00:29:21

like, well, what did you try?

Luke DePron: 00:29:21

And it's like, yeah, man, like you probably shouldn't have been

Luke DePron: 00:29:24

successful with that path because that was extremely unsustainable.

Luke DePron: 00:29:28

Like me, Mr. Fitness guy.

Luke DePron: 00:29:29

Like I would've struggled with that.

Luke DePron: 00:29:31

I probably wouldn't have been able to do that.

Luke DePron: 00:29:33

Um, and when we, you know, like the cabbage soup diet doesn't

Luke DePron: 00:29:35

seem like a long-term thing.

Luke DePron: 00:29:37

Um, and once we have that conversation and we start to kind of pull back the

Luke DePron: 00:29:42

curtain on what this has to look like, um.

Luke DePron: 00:29:46

And realize like there can be a path where like this doesn't have to be

Luke DePron: 00:29:48

as consumptive as everybody thinks.

Luke DePron: 00:29:51

And again, this kind of comes back to our original conversation.

Luke DePron: 00:29:53

Look at where most guys are looking around for information on this.

Luke DePron: 00:29:58

And it's like the extreme wins out.

Luke DePron: 00:30:01

The least sexy thing to market online is moderation.

Luke DePron: 00:30:05

I'm over here trying to sell you a moderate lifestyle change

Luke DePron: 00:30:07

that will make you feel amazing.

Luke DePron: 00:30:09

Like, that's not as sexy and trendy as, I mean, we have liver king with

Luke DePron: 00:30:13

2 million followers eating, you know, raw liver ball or raw cow balls, right?

Luke DePron: 00:30:19

Like the, the, the craziness kind of lands.

Luke DePron: 00:30:22

And so for a lot of guys, it really is just coming back and understanding

Luke DePron: 00:30:26

like, this should be standard.

Luke DePron: 00:30:28

It's normal to be healthy and fit.

Luke DePron: 00:30:30

You will have to do some things differently because the world

Luke DePron: 00:30:33

is set up in a way for you to fail, particularly nutritionally.

Luke DePron: 00:30:36

So obesogenic for sure in nature.

Luke DePron: 00:30:38

So like you're gonna have to get strategic on that, but it's nothing

Luke DePron: 00:30:41

that you have to do is superhuman.

Luke DePron: 00:30:43

Like nothing that it, it is required is superhuman.

Luke DePron: 00:30:46

Until they have that awareness, they will struggle.

Mike Forrester: 00:30:49

So one struggle that I think is pretty common is when guys

Mike Forrester: 00:30:55

will make that transition, right?

Mike Forrester: 00:30:56

They're going.

Mike Forrester: 00:30:57

Maybe to the public gym instead of working out at home.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:02

And you look around and it's like, look at all the Lukes.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:05

Yeah, sure.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:06

Yeah, sure.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:06

You know, look at all the, the guys that are lifting more, they're more intense.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:11

They're more jacked.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:13

How do you help guys to walk through?

Mike Forrester: 00:31:17

Yeah, there's, there's truth to it, but that's not your reality

Mike Forrester: 00:31:20

and neither is that like your.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:23

End of the journey, right?

Mike Forrester: 00:31:24

Mm-hmm.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:25

You're where you're, but this is not final.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:27

Yeah.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:27

How do you help them to show up for themselves to continue making progress

Mike Forrester: 00:31:32

in inside of everybody else's success?

Mike Forrester: 00:31:37

When, when you do to go to a public place like that.

Mike Forrester: 00:31:39

Sure.

Luke DePron: 00:31:39

And I mean, hey, I'm again, right?

Luke DePron: 00:31:41

I'm a fitness guy, but it's like I can walk in any gym and find the guy

Luke DePron: 00:31:45

bigger, stronger, faster, better, right?

Luke DePron: 00:31:47

Like this is life.

Luke DePron: 00:31:48

And so I think this really does come down to just recognizing

Luke DePron: 00:31:52

like it's a competition of one verse one, you versus old you.

Luke DePron: 00:31:57

Um, and I love this idea, this, this idea.

Luke DePron: 00:32:01

Um, comparison is the thief of, of joy.

Luke DePron: 00:32:03

And to me it's like, comparison can be the window of motivation, right?

Luke DePron: 00:32:07

Or inspiration of what's possible.

Luke DePron: 00:32:09

And so, you know, I just encourage guys, like there are

Luke DePron: 00:32:13

genetic freaks out there, right?

Luke DePron: 00:32:15

Most, most professional athletes probably, but like there's gonna be some guy who

Luke DePron: 00:32:19

it's like, man, he could have been in worse shape than you when he started.

Luke DePron: 00:32:21

And it's like, be inspired by that.

Luke DePron: 00:32:23

Like, look how far that guy came.

Luke DePron: 00:32:24

That's awesome.

Luke DePron: 00:32:25

And I think there's a maturity that comes with that, right?

Luke DePron: 00:32:27

Um, I think as you get older.

Luke DePron: 00:32:29

There's, you know, we still wanna be competitive of, of course.

Luke DePron: 00:32:31

But, um, I think it comes down to just kind of a mindset of, you know, I'm, I'm

Luke DePron: 00:32:36

celebrating everybody's success, man.

Luke DePron: 00:32:37

I want everybody to win them.

Luke DePron: 00:32:39

Winning doesn't mean I'm not.

Luke DePron: 00:32:41

And so I'm the, I'm the believer of like, all tides rise, all raise all ships.

Luke DePron: 00:32:44

And it's like, be inspired by that.

Luke DePron: 00:32:46

When you see a dude, you know.

Luke DePron: 00:32:48

Putting up crazy numbers at the gym, like get pumped by that.

Luke DePron: 00:32:51

Right?

Luke DePron: 00:32:51

Like, and it's, that's a choice.

Luke DePron: 00:32:52

That's just an outlook on life that I think will, uh, do you

Luke DePron: 00:32:55

wonders and everywhere you go, regardless of the situation.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:01

with getting healthy, we wanna stay healthy.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:04

Mm-hmm.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:05

But I don't think.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:07

It's, we're always looking at things long term.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:09

Mm-hmm.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:10

Right.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:10

It's just that short term, okay, I, I'm gonna do this,

Mike Forrester: 00:33:14

I'm gonna get to 185 pounds.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:17

Right?

Mike Forrester: 00:33:17

Sure.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:18

How do you help men to see what's beyond, you know, just, you know.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:25

A year, a few months, whatever it is, reaching that goal, but to instead say,

Mike Forrester: 00:33:29

Hey, this is the vibrant and alive life that's available to you afterwards.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:35

Yeah.

Mike Forrester: 00:33:35

How do you help them to see the vision beyond just the goal that they're, they're

Mike Forrester: 00:33:40

shooting for now in the short term?

Luke DePron: 00:33:41

Mike, that's such a great question because the one thing

Luke DePron: 00:33:43

I've always said about this space is you can't test drive results.

Luke DePron: 00:33:47

Like you can't sample it, right?

Luke DePron: 00:33:49

Like if you wanna buy a new tv, you can go see how beautiful it

Luke DePron: 00:33:51

looks and think like, man, that movie's gonna be so fun to watch.

Luke DePron: 00:33:55

So, I hate to say it, it usually comes, it starts from a place of pain.

Luke DePron: 00:34:00

Like guys gotta be kind of to the point where like they're sick of

Luke DePron: 00:34:03

their position that they're in and they're ready to do something.

Luke DePron: 00:34:05

Um, again, we can try to like stoke that fire a little bit.

Luke DePron: 00:34:09

And, and you know, I do ask guys the question, um, it's like, where

Luke DePron: 00:34:13

does this go three years from now?

Luke DePron: 00:34:14

If you don't.

Luke DePron: 00:34:16

Positively move things forward.

Luke DePron: 00:34:17

And we do play that out a little bit.

Luke DePron: 00:34:19

Um, again, call that a motivator if you want, um, call it a

Luke DePron: 00:34:22

sales question if you want.

Luke DePron: 00:34:23

And like I'll tell 'em, I'm like, I want you to like, sell yourself on the idea

Luke DePron: 00:34:26

of doing this, whether it's with me or without me, or somebody else on your own.

Luke DePron: 00:34:29

Like, and where will this go if you don't get into action?

Luke DePron: 00:34:34

Because it doesn't stay static for most

Mike Forrester: 00:34:37

when you've got the guys that they're finding,

Mike Forrester: 00:34:40

they're reaching their goals, Luke.

Mike Forrester: 00:34:42

How do you see the rest of their life impacted, right, as far as their

Mike Forrester: 00:34:49

rela their, their family mm-hmm.

Mike Forrester: 00:34:51

Their friends, their work.

Mike Forrester: 00:34:54

How do you see it show up in changes in those areas and, and how they

Mike Forrester: 00:34:58

show up for those, those areas?

Luke DePron: 00:35:01

So this is probably the thing that lights me up is.

Luke DePron: 00:35:06

I don't really care if, like, I'm not, I don't really care how you look, right?

Luke DePron: 00:35:12

Like I'm not a bodybuilder coach, right?

Luke DePron: 00:35:15

Like if you get a six pack, great.

Luke DePron: 00:35:17

Like, I'm excited if it means something to you.

Luke DePron: 00:35:20

Um, and I've had guys where like they are really like excited

Luke DePron: 00:35:23

about the physical changes.

Luke DePron: 00:35:25

Um, and that is fun to hear about.

Luke DePron: 00:35:28

But what's way more exciting and like, honestly, every guy

Luke DePron: 00:35:31

kind of experiences it, it's.

Luke DePron: 00:35:33

How good they feel and listening to somebody kind of describe and try to

Luke DePron: 00:35:38

like, they're trying to almost describe this like low grade fever of euphoria and

Luke DePron: 00:35:42

wellbeing that they haven't experienced.

Luke DePron: 00:35:44

And it's around energy, it's around their confidence and just, and it's like they

Luke DePron: 00:35:48

can't quite put their fingers on it and.

Luke DePron: 00:35:50

That lights me up because it does, it impacts every aspect of your life.

Luke DePron: 00:35:54

Um, how, how you show up in your career, how you show up in your relationships,

Luke DePron: 00:35:58

how you get, how you father, when you have more energy, when you have more patience,

Luke DePron: 00:36:01

when you're not stressed as much.

Luke DePron: 00:36:03

Um, I got an amazing, I'll call it a, like mess or a message from a, from

Luke DePron: 00:36:07

a client where he is, like his wife told him it was the best recovery

Luke DePron: 00:36:10

that, uh, she had of all their kids.

Luke DePron: 00:36:13

Because he like took ownership of the family nutrition and it's like, dude,

Luke DePron: 00:36:16

it's impacting your wife's like pregnancy.

Luke DePron: 00:36:17

Like that's super cool.

Luke DePron: 00:36:18

So, um, the, while there is no test drive of results, the one

Luke DePron: 00:36:24

thing is probably within a month.

Luke DePron: 00:36:27

Maybe even faster.

Luke DePron: 00:36:28

I've had guys within two weeks, you're gonna get some positive

Luke DePron: 00:36:31

feedback that the stuff is worth doing if it's approached correctly.

Luke DePron: 00:36:35

Again, if it's approaching this beat you down miserable experience, but like you

Luke DePron: 00:36:38

are gonna get you for it, you're gonna get endorphins, you're gonna feel better,

Luke DePron: 00:36:42

and all of a sudden you become that annoying person who's like posting that

Luke DePron: 00:36:45

you'd worked out and you're posting your recipes on Facebook and you're obnoxious

Luke DePron: 00:36:50

and you're telling everybody about it and it's because you feel really, really good.

Luke DePron: 00:36:53

That's probably what excites me the most.

Luke DePron: 00:36:55

And, and again, I think it impacts everything.

Luke DePron: 00:36:59

Um, but usually it's, it's, it's the relationships and like seeing

Luke DePron: 00:37:02

guys talk about showing up with, like, playing with their kids and

Luke DePron: 00:37:04

like throwing the ball around.

Luke DePron: 00:37:05

That's, that's pretty cool.

Mike Forrester: 00:37:06

I think one of the things I know that I see from

Mike Forrester: 00:37:09

coaching guys, and I'm sure you do as well, it's like regardless of what

Mike Forrester: 00:37:13

childhood you've had and if people have broken their promises to you.

Mike Forrester: 00:37:18

It may be the first time that you are experiencing somebody

Mike Forrester: 00:37:22

keeping their promises and it's you keeping your promises to yourself.

Mike Forrester: 00:37:27

Like, dude, that is so, so powerful.

Mike Forrester: 00:37:30

Yep.

Mike Forrester: 00:37:31

That it's like, I don't, I don't think that we really realize how

Mike Forrester: 00:37:35

impactful and motivating that can be when it's like I showed up for me,

Mike Forrester: 00:37:40

I kept my promises that you show up.

Mike Forrester: 00:37:46

Dude, as you show up, like the Jack Guy at the gym for yourself, just in other areas.

Mike Forrester: 00:37:51

Yeah.

Mike Forrester: 00:37:52

That it's like you're not expecting that.

Mike Forrester: 00:37:53

Is that something that you see?

Mike Forrester: 00:37:55

Well, dude,

Luke DePron: 00:37:55

hundred percent.

Luke DePron: 00:37:56

That is, that's the confidence.

Luke DePron: 00:37:57

Truthfully, again, that's the confidence more so than like, okay, great,

Luke DePron: 00:38:00

like you look good in the mirror.

Luke DePron: 00:38:01

And that like, don't get me wrong, that means something, right?

Luke DePron: 00:38:03

Like if you're a guy and you lose 50 pounds, you're gonna look in the

Luke DePron: 00:38:05

mirror and be like, yeah, this is nice.

Luke DePron: 00:38:07

Um, but it is the confidence that comes from that, that congruency and.

Luke DePron: 00:38:12

I talk about this a lot with clients, and this is where again,

Luke DePron: 00:38:15

the reason we execute on this goes deeper than just that confidence.

Luke DePron: 00:38:18

This is really where the long-term success is gonna come.

Luke DePron: 00:38:21

When we, um.

Luke DePron: 00:38:23

Talk about this idea of guaranteed minimum standards.

Luke DePron: 00:38:27

The reason we do that is we are trying to build that confidence that we are the guy

Luke DePron: 00:38:31

that does what he says he was gonna do.

Luke DePron: 00:38:33

So when the, the, the chaos of life rears its head because your kid gets sick,

Luke DePron: 00:38:37

you, you had the, the work trip, you're still gonna own those habits because

Luke DePron: 00:38:41

you've proved it time and time again.

Luke DePron: 00:38:43

And I always use the analogy of, you know, if you meet a guy, uh, if,

Luke DePron: 00:38:45

if you make a. An acquaintance at a networking event and they invite you

Luke DePron: 00:38:48

for lunch and you go to lunch and they stand you up and you're like,

Luke DePron: 00:38:51

okay, well I'll, I'll give 'em a pass.

Luke DePron: 00:38:53

And then they do it again.

Luke DePron: 00:38:54

And it's like, this guy is not reliable.

Luke DePron: 00:38:57

And unfortunately that's the um, story many guys have built up for

Luke DePron: 00:39:02

themselves around health and fitness, around weight loss, around nutrition,

Luke DePron: 00:39:08

and so we need to flip that on.

Luke DePron: 00:39:10

Flip that on its head, prove that you can do what you said you were gonna

Luke DePron: 00:39:15

do, and we make that happen through guaranteed minimum standards, not by

Luke DePron: 00:39:18

stepping into some 30 day challenge.

Mike Forrester: 00:39:21

Surprisingly, it will change what you put up with.

Mike Forrester: 00:39:25

And so your circle of friends and people you're with changes right along with it.

Mike Forrester: 00:39:30

And it's not something that you were like going, I'm gonna go work out so

Mike Forrester: 00:39:33

that I put up with, you know, less garbage from the people around me.

Mike Forrester: 00:39:37

Sure.

Mike Forrester: 00:39:37

But as, as your standard for yourself changes, it's gonna carry on out there.

Mike Forrester: 00:39:43

And so super impactful.

Mike Forrester: 00:39:45

And I love, love how that just.

Mike Forrester: 00:39:48

Those unexpected bonuses.

Mike Forrester: 00:39:51

Yeah.

Mike Forrester: 00:39:51

Show up when you were, you just thought you were tackling this problem

Mike Forrester: 00:39:55

over here and you get this present over here that it's like, yeah,

Mike Forrester: 00:39:58

that's a great gift to yourself.

Luke DePron: 00:40:01

I will say I, I probably do have more and more guys.

Luke DePron: 00:40:04

With the age that I tend to work with, and again, having families and careers

Luke DePron: 00:40:08

that they are talking, like I've had multiple people, which is really cool.

Luke DePron: 00:40:10

Be like, Hey, I'm looking for, like, I'm trying to make a legit lifestyle change.

Luke DePron: 00:40:14

And I'm like, oh, that's the magic words I need to hear.

Luke DePron: 00:40:17

Um, but you know, most, most guys do show up.

Luke DePron: 00:40:20

It's like, man, you know, like I don't like what I'm seeing in the mirror.

Luke DePron: 00:40:22

The pants aren't fitting.

Luke DePron: 00:40:23

They're over.

Luke DePron: 00:40:24

They've added some weight.

Luke DePron: 00:40:26

But I can promise you that what keeps almost every guy going

Luke DePron: 00:40:30

long term is how he feels.

Luke DePron: 00:40:32

It's the internal side of, again, just feeling really good, having more

Luke DePron: 00:40:36

energy, just this vibrant feeling that if they were the last person on earth

Luke DePron: 00:40:42

and there's no one to impress, they're still gonna do the stuff because they

Luke DePron: 00:40:44

get the, the positivity of how they feel.

Luke DePron: 00:40:47

Yeah.

Mike Forrester: 00:40:49

Dude, Luke, I love it.

Mike Forrester: 00:40:50

It's not just, you know, Hey, I'm gonna start seeing biceps less of the

Mike Forrester: 00:40:54

belly, you know, have more energy.

Mike Forrester: 00:40:57

But there are so many more rewards to it, and I appreciate you helping us to

Mike Forrester: 00:41:02

see how we can shore it up to, you know.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:06

Not necessarily guarantee our success, but like we talked

Mike Forrester: 00:41:09

about putting bumpers on there.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:10

Yep.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:11

So that we stay on the path.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:13

Yep.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:13

And dude, you've provided so many, you know, things that are encouraging and

Mike Forrester: 00:41:18

something that can seem so daunting because we're looking at Instagram

Mike Forrester: 00:41:22

and seeing the Photoshop or the light enhanced images, you know, and we just

Mike Forrester: 00:41:28

believe that that's who we gotta be.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:30

I'm not there.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:31

Yeah.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:31

Why start you've given.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:33

A way to take that first step and a reason to, you know, take that first

Mike Forrester: 00:41:39

step, not just for ourselves, but for the changes that will occur all around us.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:44

Dude, I so appreciate it and it, you know, how do guys, if they're like, I'm

Mike Forrester: 00:41:49

at that point, Luke, you know, I have all the reasons I wanna make that change.

Mike Forrester: 00:41:54

How do they get in touch with you to take that first step?

Luke DePron: 00:41:57

Sure.

Luke DePron: 00:41:58

Um, so obviously if somebody's looking for, you know, real

Luke DePron: 00:42:01

one-on-one support, they can reach out to me at fitmenproject.com.

Luke DePron: 00:42:04

Um, you can also go to Fit Men Project.

Luke DePron: 00:42:06

Um, there's a opt-in there where I literally lay out kind of the, the

Luke DePron: 00:42:10

Lean Body Method program, um, over four days of emails that kind of

Luke DePron: 00:42:14

just breaks it all down and it's like, go execute it if you want.

Luke DePron: 00:42:17

Um, obviously, you know, having some accountability, having somebody

Luke DePron: 00:42:20

to guide you, help you make the adjustments along the way can be.

Luke DePron: 00:42:22

Um, super important.

Luke DePron: 00:42:24

Um, but I've kind of laid it all out there for, um, you know, how

Luke DePron: 00:42:27

to, how to audit your nutrition.

Luke DePron: 00:42:29

What should the workouts actually look like?

Luke DePron: 00:42:30

How do we strategically increase step count?

Luke DePron: 00:42:32

So, um, I do have a, a four day little mini email course that will be super

Luke DePron: 00:42:36

supportive to any guys, um, that are looking for more of the, the tangible

Luke DePron: 00:42:39

stuff that we kind of obviously didn't dive all the way into today.

Mike Forrester: 00:42:43

Yeah, dude, Luke, I appreciate the encouragement, the

Mike Forrester: 00:42:46

inspiration and breaking through the myths that are out there to,

Mike Forrester: 00:42:50

you know, now set us on this path.

Mike Forrester: 00:42:52

So thank you so much my friend,

Luke DePron: 00:42:54

Mike, it's been great chatting with you.

Luke DePron: 00:42:55

I love what you're up to and I love the impact you're making, man.

Mike Forrester: 00:42:58

Ah, thank you my friend.

Mike Forrester: 00:42:59

I appreciate it.